That's A Relief

>>Time for the Christmas spirit! Not because it's Christmas, but because my little brother just plugged up the Christmas lights I leave hanging in my room all year. They shine in red, blue, yellow, and green---however, the blue doesn't work. It's really a shame.

>>I suppose the real celebration and thanks goes forth to Jesus/God, since they invented the heavenly thing called SUMMER. It's very relaxing, or as I learned from Mrs. Brown, "assuaging". All this free time leaves me to do liberal and required activities, such as doing laundry, cleaning my room, steadily working on my summer work (which I know most of my fellow IB students won't work on until a week or two before school starts back), rearranging my room +++, reading, thinking on future style choices (whether or not I could pull something off), swimming, chowing, chilling with rubber bands amongst my teeth...

>>Yes, summer's assuaging. I'm even not as annoyed with my family members. It's so good a feeling, yet I know that this is my last summer away from school.

>>I'm a senior. A senior. That means I'll be able to eat in the Senior Courtyard, to get out of the last class of the day on Fridays, to be able to say I have 180 days left of school ever. Ever. That's terrifying! I mean, I know I have college and all that in the future, but that's an even more horrifying thing to imagine. I want to go to SCAD, Savannah College of Art and Design. I love the city and I'd be able to work on my arts in a place that inspires me. The thing is, will I be able to stay so far away from my loved ones? Would I be responsible enough? Will I even be driving yet?

>>However it works, it will. In conclusion, I know I shouldn't be afraid of the inevitable. I just need to focus on the tests ahead of me, one at a time, take my SAT and hopefully ACT as well, and then apply. All will end well.

Tribute

>>Play "Tribute" from RageCage and Jables if you're ables. I just found something in my email that I had sent to myself, and I was curious as to what I wanted to save. I had had it in my inbox so long that I forgot. Once I opened it, I realized at once what it was. It was Krystal's explanation for why I am like I am. Here it goes:

>>My best best buddy said this to me: "You have a wall up and you've built it very high because of all the things that've hurt you. And everytime you get more hurt, it gets higher. You're strong and you're smart and you're reserved and you're DIFFERENT. People are afraid of that, because no matter how much they try, they don't know how to handle you. And you don't make it any easier. You have a clear mind that won't let you do stupid things, because you knwo you're better than those actions. People get angry, because that's the only way they get attention. And you won't do it. It makes them feel like you don't want friends, because you're not going to make yourself into a baboon for them. , that is NOT a bad thing."

>>Truthfully, for awhile, I was convinced it was a bad thing. But now I don't really care. I've learned to accept that I'm an outcast in so many aspects. Definitely when it comes to school---out of IB, which is the weird smart kids of the school along with AP, my friends and I are the weirdos amongst the IB weirdos. It's almost exclusive, how tight the cliques are in IB. You really have to watch your back and your mouth. It's maddening. But it's always been like that for me, even before IB. At Swayze's, the people I was expected to mingle with there were all Krystal's friends that were more interested in her and in each other than they were in trying to deal with my presence. In my older, more faithful ... can I even call them friends? I don't talk to them. No, they're Ferret's friends. They're my long-time acquaintances that I've known by name for years, but have no real connection to. Whatever they are, we ignore each other 99.98% of the time. Mostly my fault, though, I must admit.

>>In conclusion...I'm very thankful for the few people that I can be 100% myself around without an ounce of worry: Krystal, Ashley, and more recently, Cody. Thanks guys. You really mean a lot to me. Love.

Whoopsy

>>How silly of me! I left out the video where I taught the world how to shuffle. It's not that long, not that hard or showing of my (non)genius, but it is what it is.

>>In conclusion, I'm confused.